Relationship Flare Points: Home Improvements

No matter how happy you are and how confident you are in your relationship, there are going to be inevitable flare points. Of course, these don’t mean that you’re not happy together, or that there is some underlying problem in your relationship. They just mean that, when you are tested, you might find unique ways of aggravating one another.

Pair Heart Frogs Love Funny Valentine's Day Pose
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One of the biggest flare points that all relationships face is with home improvements. There are few things in life more stressful than changing your home, uprooting your living space, and consigning yourself to trying to live as normal despite the chaos going on around it. It’s inevitable that, at some point, there will be a flare between you and your partner. You’re both stressed, pushed to the limit, and tempers have a tendency to flare in that environment.

While there is no way of preventing this happening for sure, there are avoidance measures you can put in place to ensure that things remain as cordial as possible.

1. Limit The Amount You DIY


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If you’re going through a big change like a foundation repair or converting an attic, then some of this is taken care of for you. No DIYer should be attempting a structural foundation repair or converting beams to be more weight holding – it’s a recipe for disaster. Even if you or your other half think you can do that kind of work, if it’s not your profession, then don’t do it. If you do, an argument is going to be the last thing you should be worried about!

For everything else, try and limit the amount that you do for yourselves. Stick to basic tasks like painting or laying laminate flooring. Don’t delve into the realm of the professionals, by attempting to tile a bathroom or anything to do with the electrics. There will be an inevitable gap of knowledge and, when things don’t go right, you might turn your ire and frustration on one another.

2. Stick Together


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If one of you is going to be working on your DIY project, then agree that you both are. Nothing will stir resentment like the feeling that one of you is putting in more effort than the other. Even if you can’t both be physically involved, you can split the chores – such as costing materials – and work on them at the same time, for the same duration. The feeling of a team effort should override any annoyances about someone feeling they are doing more than their fair share.

3. Be Honest With Each Other


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If you’re mid-project and you suddenly realize that things aren’t going to plan, don’t keep that idea to yourself. You have to be honest with one another about how you think that things are progressing. If something needs to change or be done differently, that’s a decision you need to make together. If you just content yourself with biting your tongue and hoping all will be okay, you could be setting yourself up for a fall. If it does work out, great! But if it doesn’t and you give some inkling of having had a sense of impending doom, then you’re going to be blamed for not speaking up sooner.

A reminder of my articles from my post here:

  1. “Things that may cause your fatigue at home”
  2. “How to plan your vacation by yourself?”
  3. “First date tips for women”
  4. “Common mistakes women make in a relationship”
  5. “Why we should be careful with chemicals?”

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28 thoughts

  1. This was definitely a good read. I like how you compared relationships with DIY methods and techniques. Sometimes you don’t need to be in a relationship to have a successful life! Like I said, I enjoyed reading this. Keep it up!

    1. I guess it can work both for the benefit of a couple or just ruin the relationships. Depending on how you pay attention to it and what you prefer to choose. Good read! Thanks!

  2. Like the article. For me when I was living with my ex the biggest problem was the toilet seat situation. It lasted for months till we found a solution. I felt like I am in a joke all the time. 😀

  3. Hi. I cant comment much on having a spouse yet. But i do enjoy DIY projects. Built a braai. Put up a roof. Laid foundations. Connected rain tanks. Repaired walls. Built a tv cabinet….lol….time to rest also. Would have been great to have someone in my life to share ideas with her….etc etc. Somehow the joys of creating a home together with that special person always sounds so good. Wish I had that.

  4. There will always be a happy medium. You have to have an open mind and be able to discuss things for sure. Great read! Thank you for sharing.

  5. All the home improvement tips are useful and I am a new blogger and you have shared simple directions to use and I have learnt a lot of new advancing steps about accommodation petone from your blog and you have shared this blog for a good cause.

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